August 24th, 2006
into my consciousness…

i’d like to sit down and draw for a few hours and let all the weight of my thinking mind be still for a while. it feels like a burlap bag loaded with large rocks that sits perched on the top of my head. these rocks make sleeping unconfortable and i shift back and forth trying to get a better position. (this situation is made worse by a bed that was designed in the 1800′s, the kind with a mattress perched high atop a set of thin springs, making the slightest move like surfing rapids. my husband and I are taking turns on the couch so we can at least get a few hours of shuteye a night. i am still undecided which is better, the bed or the couch, they each present their own set of problems. couch=slope. bed=bounce. slope or bounce? bounce or slope? i spose the overactive brain doesn’t help the situation.)
but all of this is normal as I am finishing up the book manuscript. not having a real “home” currently (we don’t move into the house until October), i am trying to find the right place to work. nothing feels right. i put a cold piece of pizza into a plastic bag and throw it into my carry all. i now flit from cafe to library to park. i’m not going back (allowed back) to the apartment until i complete ten pages.
i need to just get down to it, but i’m fighting it today. like i so often do. every time this happens i think…”this time i won’t be able to do it.”
but i always do. it will all get done.
as always i have found the perfect quote for the occasion, (leave it to Corita to soothe my creative brain and let me know that i am exactly where i am supposed to be)…
“I have an idea for making something or i have a deadline…and i always have a kind of natural resistance to getting down to it. Somehow I feel that this kind of natural resistance is quite healthy–because all the information, sources and ideas need cooking before they can be served. So I go on living and I go on doing what might seem to be very uncreative things like shopping or cooking or washing the dishes or answering the phone or writing letters–and sometimes the data comes out and asserts itself into my consciousness, and i live with it for a while.” ~Corita Kent (from “Learning by heart”)
i now summon the bookwriting gods to come and help me. i’m not sure where the best place to contact you from is but i am planning right now to go eat my pizza on the grounds of Russel Sage.
just so you know.
and i’m wearing my green shirt with the white flowers.
and my red sneakers.
just so you know.
ten pages.
how ’bout now?

Aug 24 2006
1:21 pm
Tammy writes:

I hope the book gods come down to help you today! I can so relate. It’s amazing who important things like the laundry can be when you have to – really have to – get some writing done.

Aug 24 2006
2:02 pm
Silvia writes:

I hope the bookwriting gods have found you. If they haven’t yet, I’m pretty sure that they will in the end. Love the quote from Corinta Kent. It’s about the part that I find hard to do: just let it be for a while.

Aug 24 2006
2:46 pm
meenu bhardwaj writes:

I can imagine that not having a “home” right now is really ungrounding. it would be for me. it is hard for me to create when I don’t have a proper space to be in and it also takes me awhile to feel settled into a space.
but then I wonder if this kind of situation strips away all the distractions and you are left with only what you have to do, kind of like when I have traveled and only had my little rolly suitcase, I was so much more *present* where I was just then. no fun papers and art supplies and books to play with. just life.
no matter what be gentle on yourself. you are in fantastic transition!

Aug 24 2006
3:53 pm
Nicolle writes:

You are wonderful! Thank-you for such a beautiful, inspiring site!!!

Aug 24 2006
4:26 pm
Swirly writes:

I know they’ll find you. And we’ll all be better off for it. :)

Aug 24 2006
7:48 pm
susanna writes:

Good luck with the 10 pages, Keri! May the bookwriting gods find you, red sneakers and all. As for the sloping couch and the bouncing couch…just imagine how great your own bed will feel after you move into your new house this October! I don’t think I’ll be sleeping a wink tonight, either, as I’m heading up to Canada tomorrow morning – yippee! Oh Canada! I’ll raise a cup of Tim Horton’s coffee in a toast for you while I’m there, Keri. :)

Aug 24 2006
9:03 pm
Kaye writes:

Keri ~
Could you take mattress off those springs and place it onto the floor? Surely that would be more comfortable. Or maybe use a futon on the floor?
Blessings ~ Kaye

Aug 24 2006
10:34 pm
~Jodi Lynn writes:

Keri, I love Learning By Heart soooo much, thanks for reminding me how much. I re-read it every so often and buy copies to give to my friends. I do wish it would come back into print!
Looking forward to your new words, in the meantime I hope you can get some sleep!!!
kind regards,
~Jodi Lynn

Aug 25 2006
11:18 am
hula writes:

I am so very grounded these days (and that’s not a bad thing, oh no) but I wish to feel a little less grounded. the flitting from cafe to park to library sounds so absolutely deliciously lovely to me right now, I could cry.
(I perhaps missed the point of this entire post. however, I wish for you ten splendid pages of writing)

Aug 26 2006
3:00 am
Khani writes:

Movement is good way to jog the noggin..You must concentrate on your frontal lobe and peer into the thoughts of quantum physics..this was mentioned in a video I just rented called’” What the Bleep do we Know..Down the Rabbit Hole” of the most thought provoking films I have seen in a long time..In the meantime Miss Troy inhabitant.. I do wish you quantum leaps in your book conciousness and more cups of hot jasmine tea..sweetie.
From the old greyhair..Khani

Aug 26 2006
8:34 am
hasti writes:

I suggest you sleep on the ground. it is ok. I always sleep on the ground.

Aug 26 2006
12:06 pm
leslie writes:

hi keri
i stumbled on your blog and it has been a whilwind ride for sure. i bought your book and have read it several times through. all i can say is you seem like the kind of person everyone is searching to have as a friend. you really have the “living in the moment” thing down and i am so glad i have been able to benefit from your ideas. hang in there, these are tough times for sure. seems like everyone is trying to find a way to make a living, find a place to live that isnt too crowded, trying to make a positive difference in a complicated yet exciting world.

Aug 27 2006
2:33 pm
Dorene writes:

I’m heading out today, too. To write. To be alone. Just to be. Much luck and speed on those ten pages.

Aug 28 2006
6:24 am
m writes:

sending you book writing vibes

Aug 28 2006
5:45 pm
Beth writes:

Hope the pages got done. Is that Sister Corita Kent, printmaker and wise woman from that quote? I had a sudden rush of remembering her work…

Aug 29 2006
10:24 am
Tami writes:

Oh my! So glad to know that I’m not the only one with that “natural resistance” to the creative flow. Thanks so much for sharing that quote. It made me instantly feel better!

Aug 29 2006
10:46 am
Gayla writes:

Another great post. I am going through a period of feeling punished yet knowing this is the way it has to be. The positives can be hard to hold onto at times like this.

Aug 30 2006
6:34 am
Austin writes:

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Aug 30 2006
6:34 am
Gabriel writes:

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Aug 30 2006
3:59 pm
mac writes:

hi keri! you know, this may sound weird but..have you thought of turning your blog into a book or zines and selling them? it’s all there and done and waiting to be know? it may sound like a dumb idea nowadays since there are so many blogs online, and we’ve relegated them as being ephemeral i suppose, but i think of the journal of a solitude book and the sabrina ward harrison books — i’d like to read your blog from the beginning without having to be on the computer. and you do so many great illustrations..i’d like to have a bunch of your online pictures in print on my shelf. like the moonlight chronicles! anyway, i just thought i would throw that out there. best of luck to you guys. :)

Sep 2 2006
6:06 pm
Catherine Witherell writes:

You are so cute!

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