I am wishing for a moment to just sit and draw something for no reason other than to make lines on the page. But it seems I am completely booked up with work. Which is good I spose as it makes up for a very slow summer workwise. Such is the nature of my career, when it rains it pours. I always take the slow times as a sign from the universe to work on my own projects, time for me to do those things that have been sitting on the backburner for weeks. I sent out a manuscript today, something I did many months ago. That always feels really good. Even if nothing comes of it I just like the feeling of sending stuff out into the world. I love dropping a package into the mail. You put energy into a piece of work for many weeks, it is all you think about, and then, you let it go.
The last few weeks have been another time of transition. Contemplating what it means to be married, adapting to a new life, developing routine again (after having none for many months). We are starting to ease into a routine together, if you can call it that. I will say that it does feel different, there is a underlying consciousness that was not there before. An awareness that we are walking through this life as true partners, sharing at a deeper level. Something like that, though it is very difficult to put into words. I had a friend try to explain it to me many years ago, and I could not really grasp what he was saying until now.
He said something like, "You go out into the world with the knowledge that this person will be with you no matter what. And instead of being weighed down by that knowledge, you feel freed by it. Released."
Able to breathe in the knowing.
Posted by kerismith at September 22, 2004 05:49 PMWow, I know what you mean about feeling different after you are married. I have been happily married for 11 years and I still remember what it was like in the months just after we tied the knot. Sometimes I felt like my spirit was riding on an iridescent bubble higher and higher...it was a joyous time. Sounds silly, but I really did feel like that.
I wish the very best to you and your husband.
Posted by: Aime on September 27, 2004 04:41 PMI love the way you explaiined that feeling - and I hope to someday feel that way with someone, it sounds wonderful!
Posted by: hope on September 27, 2004 10:36 AMTake from one who has been on the path for many years you can always feel this way if your choice was the correct one and I feel yours was and if you continue to nurture it along the way. My husband and I do and we have been married 26 years and everyday we still have the special feelings only they have grown as we have grown and are even more special...I can say Life is Simply Good. Best Wishes
Posted by: Sweet N Sassy on September 26, 2004 06:36 PMThough I am not "officially" married I live with my partner and experience that same comforting feeling of knowing he will always be by my side every morning when I leave our home, and it is one of the most joyful, most comforting feelings I've ever known. Congratulations on finding the same thing in your life, Keri.:)
Posted by: Allison on September 25, 2004 09:12 AMLove your quote ! ... Hubby and I have been married for 32+ years.. and have know one another for 38+! ( I met him at 14! ) It has been a wild and wonderful roller coaster ride!.. Enjoy your ride, also !!! ... Hugs !.. Debi :o)
Posted by: debi on September 24, 2004 11:56 AMon my honeymoon trip to niagara falls i caught my hand in the seat it was very painful. a lady asked if i was ok. i replied "my husband has gone to find ice" this was the first time that i had used that word"husband" to describe my mate. meanwhile at the other end of the train. Jay, my husband was saying for the first time, "my wife has just caught her hand in the train".
Posted by: kim on September 24, 2004 09:40 AMI married my husband over three years ago, and I spent about a year adjusting to the idea of marriage and what it meant for me to be inside of that idea. I've learned that I won't stop adjusting and readjusting myself, but I find this freeing, and I don't know how to explain it either. Congratulations on your marriage! I hope that it guides you as well as it has guided me.
Posted by: schmutzie on September 23, 2004 12:35 PMGreat words to here this morning!
Posted by: monicalee on September 23, 2004 09:46 AMI wish you success!
Posted by: Jayne on September 23, 2004 08:30 AMI am so happy you wrote another manuscript! I hope it comes out well for you!
Posted by: Holly on September 22, 2004 11:05 PMYes!
Posted by: Donavan on September 22, 2004 11:04 PMI understand COMPLETELY!
Posted by: Angela Giles Klocke on September 22, 2004 06:46 PM